Becoming Self-Responsible
Restored from the Empower Network archive (2011–2017), lightly edited to meet our current advertising standards. Views are the original author’s.
Becoming Self-Responsible. Big Topic!
You must first start with accepting yourself for who you are and where you are in your life. If you are in a constant state of fear or you find yourself running away from your problems rather than trying to conquer them, then you aren’t being self-responsible. You are just being controlled by your emotions. You are ultimately going nowhere in life if you operate in this fear-based emotional paradigm forever.
“Where you are and what you have is a result of the person you have become.” -Jim Rohn
A Self-Responsible Mindset Is Fearless
It is important that you understand that most people on Earth in the past 6,000 years have been operating out of fear. Most people are in some way trying to escape their situation and/or their reality. They do this via poor eating habits, poor time management, drugs, alcohol, etc. Anything that can warp your perspective of your situation or distract you from your reality should be considered something to be avoided. Your very life depends on your being responsible for yourself!
What you really need to do is become fearless. You need to fight and WIN every single time. The more often you fight and win, the easier it is to be self-responsible! Pretty soon winning will be so rooted in your beliefs that you cannot ever see yourself losing or running away.
Self-Responsible: Fight or Flight?
When people are faced with a challenge, most people choose flight rather than fight.
When you are faced with a challenge, you will respond with fight or flight. This response is hardwired into your brain. When we are very young (ages 1-6), we learn how to respond to problems in this very basic way. Once we have figured out something that works, whether it be something that helped us conquer our challenge, or something that comforted us to escape the challenge, the subconscious will latch on to these emotions and hard wire them into our very being.
For example: You are playing with your friends when you are five. You accidentally fall and hurt your knee. Your grandma comes along and says “Awhh… Let me make it all better …here, have some ice cream.”
Let’s say this happens whenever you get hurt.
An association has now been made between pain and ice cream. Now in your adult life, whenever you find yourself in a stressful situation, you go eat half of a gallon of ice cream to try to escape your pain. This is a very basic example, but you can see how the patterns that started when you were young will play themselves out over and over in your life until you decide to change them.
In another example, let’s say that you wanted to win a science fair contest. You go to your parents to ask them some important thing that you are interested in learning about. Your parents tell you that your efforts are in vain and that you would be better off just watching TV. Your goals are unworthy in their eyes. Now in your adult life, you see your values and goals as unworthy; your time not valuable, and your dreams, worthless. You can see how something so simple can have such horrible effects on your life and your efforts to become self-responsible?
It Doesn’t Have To Take Years To Become Self-Responsible!
Many people try for years and years and years to become self-responsible without success. I personally tried to change my life and become self-responsible for many years. I wanted to be self-responsible! I created plans and goals to become self-responsible. I would try and try to stick to these plans, but the plans never worked.
Check out my post, The Truth About Success, to understand how I solved this problem.
I know that I am not alone. Know that you are not alone, either. Many people go through their ENTIRE LIVES and they don’t figure out how to change and become self- responsible. You’ve gotta trust me. It doesn’t take years to become self-responsible! For me, it happened within a one-week period! Now I own the fact that I am self-responsible. Nobody can tell me otherwise because I took it to heart and ran with it.
This just goes to show that with the right information, it is not difficult to become self- responsible. As the old adage goes: Knowledge is Power.
You just gotta remember that you are the only person that can hold yourself to be self- responsible. Becoming self- responsible has nothing to do with other people. You win this game by becoming your own master. It takes some time and some initial dedication, but once you get the ball rolling, the only thing that can stop you is you.
The Internal State Of Being Self-Responsible
So what is the difference between the person who achieves all of their success and the person who does nothing and goes nowhere? State. The state of mind you most often find yourself in determines who you will believe yourself to be on a subconscious level. Be 100% certain that you fill your mind with happy thoughts CONSTANTLY.
You need to think like this for a few weeks before your subconscious mind takes hold of it and it becomes your new pattern; your new way of thinking. When this happens, the majority of your internal state of mind will be automatic in this new way.
Think of it like this. You are a bucket. (LOL)
Your bucket has been empty for many, many years. Why? Because your bucket is full of holes. Every time you ever tried to put anything into your bucket, it just went straight out the bottom. These holes are subconscious beliefs. Once you fix these holes, you can then hold water in your bucket! *What a GRAND concept*
Once you have fixed most or all of the holes, you can now start to pour in the water. You want your water to be very happy, healthy, and successful water. You don’t want to pour in demonic motor oil.
Think happy thoughts as often as you possibly can. Think about what you want and visualize it. Experience intensely joyful emotions along with your visions. Emotions help your mind a LOT to remember.
Once your bucket is full of this good stuff, you are all set. Each day, however, some of it will inevitably spill out or leak out the bottom. Someone might even come and beg for some of your nice water. This is why you need to ‘top it off’, so to speak. Have additional happy thoughts that help to top off your bucket every day so that it doesn’t get low. If your bucket gets low, you risk losing all your water and have to start over again.
Be on the lookout for holes. Not all holes that you fixed will stay fixed forever. The holes will go away over time, but you must stay consistent. This is an ongoing process.
Now isn’t that GREAT news??!! All you need to do is commit to be self-responsible for just a few days and you will feel so much more relieved that you will want to FILL YOUR ENTIRE BUCKET WITH GOODIES. Once you fill it up, you will never want to go back to the empty bucket days.
I think that this bucket analogy is great. If someone would have told me that I was a bucket with holes, I probably could have become self-responsible a lot sooner.
By the way…in case you were wondering…this is what my bucket looks like now:
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