A Man’s Experience into the Wonderful World of Bra Fitting and Sizing

Restored from the Empower Network archive (2011–2017), lightly edited to meet our current advertising standards. Views are the original author’s.

Today I found myself in no-man’s land.  It wasn’t as scary as anyone might have made it out to sound.  Al Bundy (Married…with Children), Homer Simpson (The Simpsons) and Stan Smith (American Dad) may not have made it out alive, but I most certainly did.

The day started out with an innocent request from a friend.  She has limited access to a car and needed a lift to a store to be ‘fitted’.  Sure I said, no problem.  And so it went.

We arrived at the Wizard of Bras in Monrovia California and were met with a shining smile from the woman behind the register.  My friend was shuffled off to meet with her ‘adviser’ and I was directed toward the waiting room.

I was expecting a small closet in the back of some store room, but was happily greeted by a fairly large room with chairs and couches.  There were dolls and other toys for the children that are probably placed here at times so their moms can also be ‘Advised’.  There was a TV with a running loop of commercials advertising not only the proper fitting of a bra but also some of their intricate clothing and a ‘travel’ type video where the Wizard of Bras was the focused stop for that episode.

Being an avid reader, I promptly walked up to the magazine table expecting to find tons of back issues of Vogue or Modern Family.  What I found was also an extremely current subscription to Archeology magazine, after glancing through and reading a few of the choice articles on ‘tomb raiders’, evidence of earlier Viking cross-ocean excursions as well as some interesting articles on pyramids found in various parts of the world. (I knew they were prolific, but not to that extent) I turned my attention to the wall art.

On the walls is a few series of cartoons depicting various clients and their fitting and sizing concerns.  Having grown up with a different kind of anatomy, and an anatomy that comes with its own ‘unique’ issues, I found the information I found there fascinating.

For instance, The measure of the ‘waist’ size of a bra is not from the waist!  Did not know that.  It is the measure across the chest from directly underneath of the arm pits.  Fascinating (to me at least)

Another is the ‘cup size’.  This is a mathematical contortionist variance on comparison, not on ‘exact’ size.  What I learned is that a ‘B’ cup for one person may not necessarily be a ‘B’ cup for another.  To learn the ‘cup’ size, you take a second diameter measurement across the ‘fullest’ part of the chest.  Subtract the first number from this and then apply a simple cypher to the result.

For instance…  If a woman’s ‘chest’ is 36 inches and the ‘fullest’ measurement is 40 inches, then there is a different of ’4′ between the two sizes.

Using this cypher… 1 = A, 2 = B, 3 = C, 4 = D…  We determine that the ‘starting point’ for fitting the bra is at 36D sized.

Unfortunately, this is only an estimation, as all women are different, and After the ‘D’ cup size, manufactures differ as well.  Pretty standard until after ‘D’ sizing, but then I guess the manufacturers get to have ‘artistic freedom’ with the sizes.

Shortly after have ‘learned’ so much about this ‘art form’, my friend came out of her fitting, with a very large smile on her face as well as, what appeared to me, a deep sigh of relief. And off to lunch we went.  I didn’t have a chance to relate this newly acquired and interesting information to her, but maybe she will read this posting.

By the way, on the video loop they had in the waiting room, the woman being interviewed mentioned (many times as I couldn’t help but not hear it), that the proper fit to a woman’s bra can have significant effects on a woman’s mood!

So, if you know of any woman who have ever complained about pain, discomfort or anything in their chest or back, you might want to mention, gift or SURPRISE them with a professional bra fitting.  You might just become their hero.

I am not being given any remittance by The Wizard of Bras, but since that is where I was, here is their information:

The Wizard of Bras
1530 S Myrtle Ave
Monrovia, CA 91016
(626) 358-6216

As for me, I survived and came away with some great knowledge I may never use.  But if I do… I know where to send or take someone to have it done right!!

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