Recipe for a happy marriage
Restored from the Empower Network archive (2011–2017), lightly edited to meet our current advertising standards. Views are the original author’s.
recipe for a happy marriage
Recipe for a happy marriage
Today my marriage is twenty five years old. It has been a long road of ups and downs. As I look back on those twenty five years, my husband and I had more adversity, than most married couples. We went through five job losses, and now eight years of my husbands bout with progressive multiple sclerosis. I am not saying we did not have some good times in our marriage, but it seems the hard times outweighed the good times.
I guess the best advice I can give any couple is do not get married, if you cannot handle adversity very well. All marriages go through good times and bad times. A marriage is like a garden; it takes work and dedication to keep it thriving. Yes, you do need to pick the weeds, cultivate, fertilize, water and all the necessary things it takes to keep it alive. Most people think all their problems are solved when they get married, and they do not have to put the effort they put in when dating. WRONG!
Daily life can get in the way of a marriage, jobs, bills, kids, house chores, technology, friends, and other stuff. Due to all the above the average married couple spends about four minutes alone time with each other in a day.
Marriage still has a high rate of divorce, 50% in the United States. Another reason to spend more time in developing the marriage, instead of ignoring it. Try to cut out a portion of your day and spend time with your partner, communicating about the things that are going around you. Do not wait to communicate when you are angry; do not let things build up.
There are a lot of women in the United States having children without being married. I know several people who are in this situation. Personally, I do not understand why someone would want to have kids without having a dedicated partner. Kids take a lot of energy, and it really does take two committed people to help raise them. Your partner will have certain strengths that will help in child rearing.
Marriage has never been easy, and no one can predict their future and what type of adversity may come their way. It takes a strong committed person to stay married, and to try to do what they can to keep it strong. Marriage is not for the meek and mild! The recipe for a happy marriage comes through trial and error!