Paraprosdokians

Restored from the Empower Network archive (2011–2017), lightly edited to meet our current advertising standards. Views are the original author’s.

I received this email today and it is a must share for those who have never seen it… Thanks to Bob!!

Enjoy and check out this link at the bottom for more

Paraprosdokian
(para prozz dok EE an)

is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect, sometimes producing an anticlimax. For this reason, it is extremely popular among comedians and satirists.

Some examples…

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list.

If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong.

We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Some people are like Slinkies … not really good for anything, but you can’t help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.

I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

There’s a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can’t get away.

I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not sure.

I always take life with a grain of salt, plus a slice of lemon, and a shot of tequila.

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

OK… here’s my attempt! No silent booing please!! LOL

I thought I wanted a job, but I realized I wanted nice money in my bank account and an awesome life!

– Nikki

182 Paraprosdokians

http://www.economicnoise.com/2011/09/05/182-paraprosdokians/