How To Develop Empathy For Others
Restored from the Empower Network archive (2011–2017), lightly edited to meet our current advertising standards. Views are the original author’s.
We Can All Develop Empathy For Others
We all have the capacity to develop empathy for others and in doing so, enhance the quality of our own lives. So what is empathy? It’s being able to see someone else’s perspective and point of view and how they are feeling and responding to them with appropriate actions. This means showing compassion, not to be confused with pitying or feeling sorry for someone.
Sympathizing means that you intellectually understand the person whereas empathizing means that you actually understand and feel what the other person feels.
The most empathy that we display is in the first two years of our life. It can continue to be developed throughout our lives but sometimes, what we experience can hinder the development. If children are not encouraged to display empathy in certain situations, they can tend to be selfish, self-absorbed and mainly acting out of self-interest.
If children are neglected or abused in their early years, they have a greater risk of becoming aggressive in later life. If their emotional needs are not met, they often have difficulty understanding the actions and feelings of others.
Of course, we all have different upbringings, cultures, opinions and beliefs to contend with that may be in total contrast with the other persons experiences. So, it is important to use our imagination and try to see why the other person thinks and feels the way they do.
“If your emotional abilities aren’t in hand, if you don’t have self-awareness, if you are not able to manage your distressing emotions, if you can’t have empathy and have effective relationships, then no matter how smart you are, you are not going to get very far.” – Daniel Goleman
Ways To Develop Empathy Towards Others
Listening is an essential skill to practice and by listening intently when someone speaks to you, it shows that you care…… it ensures that you fully comprehend the speakers’ intent and motivation behind what they are conveying. It allows you to pick up on subtle nuances and interpret their intent accurately so you can respond in a sensitive manner and it can avoid any conflict which might have come about because of misunderstanding.
Secondly, by listening closely, this will strengthen your connection with the speaker and allow you to establish rapport and if you allow yourself to be vulnerable, it will allow both of you to bond. Be open to the possibility of having to open up if necessary so as to deepen your connection with the speaker.
Learn to treat people as if they are just as important as yourself. Remember not to tell the person what they should or shouldn’t have done. Most of the time, they will already know and ultimately, they are just looking for validation and for understanding and acceptance.
Keep an open mind….. avoid being judgemental and even if you disapprove of the other persons’ behaviour or actions…. sometimes all they might need is an arm around them or a hug or an offer of help.
So having an empathetic manner is one of the most effective ways of improving your people skills and interactions with others. It assists you in building relationships and garnering co-operation and trust from others.
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