Today\u2019s post is going to be personal\u2026well as personal as I can get without bursting into tears.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s weird how things can change in an instant.\u00a0 Three weeks ago I got a very unexpected phone call phone.\u00a0 It was from someone I hadn\u2019t seen in a long time \u2014 someone who I had only spoken to on occasion.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t even have his phone number saved in my phone, so when I returned the call, I didn\u2019t know who to expect.<\/p>\n
This person was going through a tough time in his life and needed someone to talk to.\u00a0 He thought about me, looked up my number, and called.\u00a0 This, of course, took me by surprise\u2026but it also made me feel really good.\u00a0 Someone needed help and reached out to me?\u00a0 My mind was blown and my heart was flattered.<\/p>\n
I reached out in friendship to this person in a situation where many would have just been freaked out and turned the other way.<\/p>\n
During the next two weeks, the two of us became closer and started dating.\u00a0 We talked about everything.\u00a0 We laughed.\u00a0 We made plans.\u00a0 I have to be honest and say I was very taken aback.\u00a0 This guy treated me better than most have ever treated me.\u00a0 He made me feel very special in a very short period of time.\u00a0 I was also a little scared.\u00a0 The main reason being was that the feelings I developed for him came so quickly \u2014 quicker than they ever have in my entire life.\u00a0 And the great thing about it was that it wasn\u2019t one-sided.\u00a0 He felt the same way.<\/p>\n
I\u2019m not one to give into these types of feelings so quickly.\u00a0 I usually try to be \u201chard\u201d and protect myself.\u00a0 I\u2019ve had my share of broken hearts\u2026and the thought of having another one\u2026well\u2026<\/p>\n
The past few weeks have been some of the best of my life.\u00a0 I felt that maybe I had finally found the one I\u2019m supposed to be with.\u00a0 Or at least someone that I could see myself with for a long time.\u00a0 Things were great.\u00a0 Maybe a little too great.<\/p>\n
And then it all changed.<\/p>\n
He called up his ex-girlfriend, who had previously physically and emotionally abused him, to tell her that he had moved on and to stop contacting him.\u00a0 In my mind I thought this would make everything better\u2026for the both of us.<\/p>\n
It didn\u2019t.<\/p>\n
She cried.\u00a0 She swore she would change.\u00a0 He called me.\u00a0 He said, \u201cI\u2019m confused.\u201d<\/p>\n
And just like that, my heart was crushed.<\/p>\n
Just like that, we both went from being happy and excited about the future to being hurt, confused, and miserable.<\/p>\n
I found myself being very angry at myself.\u00a0 I felt like an idiot.\u00a0 I felt stupid.\u00a0 How could I have let this happen to me?\u00a0 I should have known better.<\/p>\n
I hated myself for being sad.\u00a0 I hated myself for crying.\u00a0 I felt lost\u2026and numb.<\/p>\n